Bird Vendetta

So, I think birds have some sort of hit placed on me. A few years ago I was driving across a bridge with the sun roof open and there was an unfortunate incident involving a bird. I won't be graphic with the details, but let's just say 2 years later I'm still very apprehensive to drive with the sunroof open.

Then, Christmas Day I was parked on my dad's driveway and this happened:

The picture really doesn't do it justice... I couldn't see out of the windows and despite the fact that it was 25 degrees outside and the roads are a mess, I had to spend money on a car wash.

Why do the birds hate me??