Believe

Happy New Year's Eve! I can't believe 2010 is coming to an end. This year has gone by so, so fast I can barely recall everything that happened.

The past couple of years have definitely been challenging. I've lost many people that I love and some days I still struggle with the fact they aren't here. This summer an old co-worker and friend was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma and has since been fighting for his health. And then this past November I lost my beloved grandpa. It was a long, difficult year for him. He moved out of his home and quickly ended up in a nursing home. He then was in and out of the hospital with various issues and those that love him had to watch him slowly deteriorate. So while it was incredibly difficult to lose him, it was comforting to know he was no longer struggling.

The end of 2010 has brought about some changes. After 23 months of unemployment, I will be working again starting January 3rd. It's funny... I've never been a big believer in signs, but I think that has now changed. I was laid off at the end of January, 2010. I hadn't heard from the company I worked for (a company that places workers by contract to other companies) since shortly after being laid off. I had resubmitted my resume, but not applied for any jobs with them as the ones posted were not in my field. The morning after my grandpa passed away the company called me about a job opening. I had just finished meeting with the funeral home and the minister was on his way to my house and I get this call about a job. It was just the oddest timing. I had been my grandpa's caretaker and it would have been difficult to take this job with him here. Maybe it was a coincidence. Maybe it was fate. Maybe it was my grandpa telling me it was time to get my lazy ass out of this house and back to working. Who really knows?

This whole rant is really a long way of getting to something a read online today on a few different blogs. The posts were about choosing a word for 2011... a mantra of sorts. I'm not much into making resolutions - I've usually broken them before they've even started, but this word thing I think I can handle.

The word I've chosen for 2011 is "Believe". I'm going to believe that things will be better. Believe that this job is meant to be and it will be great. Believe that I have seen enough loss over the past 3 years and that this year will not see more. Believe that my friend is going to beat this cancer. Believe that change is a good thing. Believe that the things that have happened in the past were meant to pave the way for something amazing.

So, to anyone out there who might read this, my wish for you and your new year is this: Believe that anything is possible. Believe there are good times to come. Believe in yourself, in your loved ones, in God, in whatever you choose... just believe in something.